You may have heard the terms 'dandelion' and 'orchid' used to describe different types of children in psychology. These are metaphors that compare children to different types of flowers according to how they respond to different types of environments. Children are, of course, naturally resilient and adaptable, and most are able to thrive in any environment. However, others may flourish only under the most favorable conditions, as Psychology Today points out.
Developmental Pediatricians Bruce J. Ellis and W. Thomas Boyce coined the term "orchid child" in a 2005 paper, and Boyce wrote a book called The Orchid and the Dandelion: Why Sensitive People Struggle and How All Can Thrive exploring this concept in detail.
The difference between a dandelion child and an orchid child
As the names of the flowers suggest, a dandelion child would be the more resilient of the two types, whereas an orchid child would be considered highly sensitive. Boyce says that most kids tend to be like dandelions; "fairly resilient and able to cope with stress and adversity in their lives". He refers to orchid children as being "more sensitive and biologically reactive to their circumstances, which makes it harder for them to deal with stressful situations", according to NPR.
Boyce also points out that; "Orchid children seem to thrive on having things like dinner every night in the same place at the same time with the same people, having certain kinds of rituals that the family goes through week to week, month to month." He says, "This kind of routine and sameness of life from day to day, week to week, seems to be something that is helpful to kids with these great susceptibilities."
So, why do some children need more supportive and nurturing conditions to thrive, as well as the comfort of a regular routine, whereas dandelion children seem to cope better in adverse situations and life in general?
Why are some children dandelions and others orchid children?
A child's resilience isn't necessarily determined by their upbringing, as pointed out in an article by The Guardian; "People seem to have terrible childhoods and yet manage to thrive despite them. Others grow up in loving homes but suffer from mental and physical health difficulties, even if their siblings do not."
Indeed, according to research, 15 to 20 per cent of children experience well over half of the recorded psychological illnesses, with the remaining 75 to 80 per cent being comparatively healthy: a pattern that continues into adulthood, and appears to be true for children around the world, as the article outlines.
What's even more interesting is that you can find a dandelion child and an orchid child in siblings brought up in the same household. Judy, a Hypnotherapist with a master’s degree in cognitive and social psychology, went viral for asking and supposedly answering the following question on TikTok: “Why is it that siblings with similar trauma cope differently?”
Rather than explain why two siblings are able to cope differently with similar traumas though, Judy simply describes the different ways in which they individually respond to abusive environments, and then highlights the fact that if an orchid child is removed from that abusive environment and grows up and is then replaced into a nurturing and nourishing environment, they can actually surpass their dandelion counterparts.
The findings of one study that examined the biological vs environmental factors at play, suggests that children’s biological sensitivity to social context played an important role, affecting childrens' early experiences of family adversity and how they were able to adapt. This means that there is a biological component to determining whether a child is more or less resilient.
Dandelion children FAQ
What is a dandelion military child?
The dandelion is the official flower of the military child because it symbolises the resilience and adaptability of military children. the metaphor extends to the fact that dandelion seeds are blown away by the wind, carried far and wide, but the plant can take root and bloom wherever it lands. Dandelions are also hardy, upright plants that can survive in a variety of different climates, and they have strong roots that grown quickly into the ground.
How do you know if you're a dandelion child?
If you are able to adapt to new places, people and situations quickly, and can grow and thrive despite challenges, bouncibng back easily, then you are probably a dandelion child. Dandelion children enjoy success in their lives by working hard no matter what is tryihng to pull them down, they are achievers and generally portray themselves as strong and capable.
Proud aunt to her teen niece, Zara Mohammed is a Digital Writer for Mother&Baby. She has 10 years freelance writing experience creating lifestyle content for various platforms, including pregnancy, women’s health, parenting, child development and child mental health, plus lots of fun seasonal family articles and celebrity news.